Skip to content

✨FREE U.S. SHIPPING OVER $30✨

The 12 Names of Ohnut, in SONG

The 12 Names of Ohnut, in SONG

Here at Ohnut, we fully endorse getting a little silly. If that silliness involves the power of song and friendship—even better.

[Verse 1]

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 2]

On the second day of Christmas, my neighbor gave to me

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 3]

On the third day of Christmas, my gyno gave to me

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 4]

On the fourth day of Christmas, my Bubbie gave to me

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 5]

On the fifth day of Christmas, my partner gave to me

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 6]

On the sixth day of Christmas, my best friend gave to me

Six springie ringies

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 7]

On the seventh day of Christmas, my grandma gave to me

Seven squishy pushies

Six springie ringies

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 8]

On the eighth day of Christmas, Debbie gave to me

Eight humper bumpers

Seven squishy pushies

Six springie ringies

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 9]

On the ninth day of Christmas, my therapist gave to me

Nine thruster adjusters

Eight humper bumpers

Seven squishy pushies

Six springie ringies

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 10]

On the tenth day of Christmas, my cool aunt gave to me

Ten eggplant coozies

Nine thruster adjusters

Eight humper bumpers

Seven squishy pushies

Six springie ringies

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 11]

On the eleventh day of Christmas, Oprah gave to me

Eleven boning buffers

Ten eggplant coozies

Nine thruster adjusters

Eight humper bumpers

Seven squishy pushies

Six springie ringies

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

[Verse 12]

On the twelfth day of Christmas, I gave to myself

Twelve cushions for the pushin'

Eleven boning buffers

Ten eggplant coozies

Nine thruster adjusters

Eight humper bumpers

Seven squishy pushies

Six springie ringies

Sex that makes me feel good about myself

Four cervix savers 

Three penis hugs

Two dick donuts

And an Ohnut under the tree

 


  

Want to know where it all started? Check out stories of holidays past below!

12 Names of Ohnut, Part I

12 Names of Ohnut Part II

"There's no better way to spread Christmas cheer than singing loud for all to hear."

-Buddy, Elf

Older Post
Newer Post

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published

Related Posts

Big Dick Energy: The History of the Big Dick Pt. III

If Europeans were into smaller penises for literal centuries—why are so obsessed with big dicks in the United States these days? 

Painful Sex: Is the Cervix to Blame?

Today’s all about unmasking the culprit behind painful sex—is it the cervix… or something else?

I'm Not Ovary-Acting Pt. II: Pelvic Health in the Doctor’s Office

What does the research say is happening in doctor’s offices and what’s their sexual health training like? Let’s get into it.
Close (esc)

Popup

Use this popup to embed a mailing list sign up form. Alternatively use it as a simple call to action with a link to a product or a page.

Age verification

By clicking enter you are verifying that you are old enough to consume alcohol.

Search

Your cart is currently empty.
Shop now